[6/6/22] Mind-Body Monday: Feelings Vs. Emotions
Today I will be talking about the difference between Feelings and Emotions. Two very similar sounding words and concepts, however they have very different effects in the body. I will describe how they process and you will be able to see how they can affect the body and thus your health and well-being. Before we begin I want you to understand that this is going to be a someone esoteric explanation and description. So if it doesn’t resonate with you, don’t worry, If you choose you can give this Live another listen at a different time. Nothing I ever share with you needs to be Your Truth. I share it because it is my understanding of truth, and I have found it to help myself and others release mental suffering and physical pain. So schedule a free session with me if you want some “specific to your life” examples.
So let’s start with Feelings.
Feelings come and go. They rise and fall throughout your day. You can have a physical feeling of hunger or tiredness or you can have a mental feeling of overwhelm, or an emotional feeling of frustration or sadness. The key component of feelings is that they are transitory. We don’t ascribe them to permanent parts of our psyche, we don’t generally hold on to them and try to give them a home in our bodies, we simply allow them to be what they are, and that is a sensation that has been brought to our awareness.
We do not generally judge our feelings. We feel what feels right to feel in any given moment. We allow ourselves to simply find awareness of the sensation, and do what we can, to either solve, release or ignore the feeling so we can go on with our day open to the next feeling that arises.
I like to think of feelings like leaves on a blustery day. We can watch them move hither and yon, fly high or far away, stick to us for a moment, the blow off again. And feelings are healthy in this way. They move past us and through us, and generally don’t affect our sense of purpose or meaning or balance in life.
We don’t recommit ourselves to something different than we have previously believed in, because of a feeling. We do not make strong statements that cannot be revoked, because of a feeling. We don’t start fights or arguments. We have awareness, and then we decide if that serves us. We often do this unconsciously, so if you are thinking that you don’t know if you have ever thought that much about a feeling, then I challenge you to a game of paying attention next time you have one. See if you notice how ready you are to release it to the next one, or simply solve it with some quick action. Like that leaf in the wind, our feelings blow by us constantly, only occasionally sticking for any length of time. When they do however…. When we find a reason to make this transitory feeling into something more, why then, it becomes an Emotion.
Emotions are the opposite of feelings, in the sense that they are that which we store in our bodies, rather than let fly by. We attach emotions to circumstances or individuals, and we give them homes and move them in. Everyone has constructs in their energetic systems where they store emotions. For the purpose of this explanation, I want you to imagine them as dwellings. For emotions that are rarely felt or not felt deeply, we may simply have one large home with many rooms and each time we feel an experience that we decide to make an emotion, rather than just let it be a feeling, we add another room. Kind of like the Winchester Mystery House, if any of you have ever of that. We move the new experience in with all the other tenants in our system we refuse to release.
Some emotions are stronger, and they have connected to many different circumstances and people throughout our lives. They reside in larger “dwellings”, I think of them as an apartment complex or series of condos. Generally, there is always a sign on the lawn out front that lets our system know what or who lives there. Examples of some common signs that we all generally have, might be Betrayal, Loss, or Abandonment. Some other signs might be: Dismissed, Unwanted, Disrespected or Unworthy. When we have a feeling that connects with something we have stored in our system based on memories that we refuse to give up or release, we are often unconsciously on the look-out for more examples to prove we were right to hold on these feelings and make them into emotions.
If for example I walk down the hallways of my apartment of feeling Unwanted, I might find the time my father back-handed me when I was a child. Or perhaps I would see the time I begged someone for attention and was dismissed, or perhaps another room would hold a failed relationship, or a boss that treated me poorly. Each time there was a chance for me to just have a “feeling” about something and let it go. But, instead I gave the experience the weight and gravitas of an emotion and combined it with all the other emotions that felt like it, making it too much to hold on to and survive, so I had to store it somewhere and I moved it in.
This is why you might have said, I have worked my issues with my father or brother or mother or lover again and again, and they still keep coming up, Why? I have looked at it over and over, I have cried, released, forgiven… Why is it still there? Well, often that can be because you haven’t dismantled the house the memory and emotion lived in, so it just keeps popping up with a flashing “Vacancy” sign, whenever you have a feeling that reminds you of the emotional state.
So, why is this a problem? Well, because while feelings are released, emotions often become Belief Systems. Belief Systems that are too difficult to easily unroot. How can you let go of the initial feeling that you are “unworthy” if for instance you already have so many lodgers in a home of Abandonment? Each time you entered a room in your mind to revisit the memory of the loss of something or someone you thought you loved or needed or wanted or deserved, it would reiterate the emotion of abandonment until it validated your self-determination of being Unworthy.
Storing these emotions and building them structures and rooms to reside in, make them harder and harder to release. They make us more and more certain that we are deserving of these painful experiences, and thus unknowingly we can also look for them and call them to us. We have spoken about the Law of Attraction before and based its precepts we know that we attract what we most think about it and ruminate on. So, with this example I just gave you, you can see that we could continually attract relationships with the same or opposite sex that validate our belief that we are unworthy or unlovable or somehow damaged in some way that makes us unable to be truly happy and free.
So can we do we do about this? Well, the first step is awareness. I recommend that after this live you take a moment to meditate on the structures you have built inside yourself that are just waiting for more opportunities to find occupants. What do they say? What are they called? Who lives there? Seeking inside yourself for answers is the first step towards healing. To see it is to free it.
The next step is to release the need to self-punish by refusing to forgive and let go of these memories. I can promise you that no matter how horrible they are, if they are in the past, then that where they need to stay. They don’t deserve a space in your consciousness. They don’t warrant a room in your body. They need to be freed, kicked out and sent packing. And you need to realize that it wasn’t your fault. That you weren’t stupid or foolish, and the experience was a lesson that you can release. You don’t need to hold on to painful lessons to prevent them from reoccurring. Like I just explained, holding on to these memories and storing them just makes more likely to have them reoccur than it does to protect you from them.
When you create a belief system you are asking the universe to validate you in it. So knowing this, how about taking control of this power of creation and bring yourself what you want and not more of what you fear.